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The lost innocence
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Poems, Words, Random things, Etc by Apocalypse409

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Submitted on
September 4, 2012
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476 bytes
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My innocence is lost
one night, I lost this treasure
I thought to be ready
I thought being loved

but for him, I was a bitch
for him, I was a toy
the love had disappeared

I regret this night
I regret my impatience

Today I am a princess without crown
a teenager at heart injured
which seeks forgot this day
a first time
a first disappointment
the love is hard
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:iconfullmetalfroggie:
FullMetalFroggie Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Professional Artist
A strong start. The second verse would be more powerful written in the present tense rather than past, "But for Him, I am a bitch - For Him, I am a toy - The love has disappeared", also there seem to be some missing words and punctuation towards the end of the poem, I do not know if this is intentional, to portray a broken state of mind, if so it could be exaggerated further. Overall a nice idea for a poem.
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:iconkatsumoto82:
katsumoto82 Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013
yes,this was the idea
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:iconcarmenveloso:
CarmenVeloso Featured By Owner Sep 14, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
This deviation has been added to the group's favourites.
:iconoutstanding-women:
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:iconkatsumoto82:
katsumoto82 Featured By Owner Sep 14, 2012
thanks:)
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:iconbeautifuladmiration:
BeautifulAdmiration Featured By Owner Sep 7, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Ver powerful and very deep.
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:iconkatsumoto82:
katsumoto82 Featured By Owner Sep 8, 2012
thanks:)
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:iconbeautifuladmiration:
BeautifulAdmiration Featured By Owner Sep 8, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Your welcome. :)
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:iconpolish-princess:
Polish-Princess Featured By Owner Sep 7, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
This is a very powerful piece that I can also relate to. Well written :heart:
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:iconkatsumoto82:
katsumoto82 Featured By Owner Sep 7, 2012
thanks:)
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:iconawayfromtrouble:
Awayfromtrouble Featured By Owner Sep 7, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
That happens
But you can do something about it
Pray
:)
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